As a mother I am struggling to find balance between my needs and that of my child. 
Before I had my son fitness was a very important part of my life. I enjoyed going to the gym and getting in a workout most days of the week. I had discovered my love for running and had successfully completed two half marathons which I considered to be highlights of my life.
Once I got pregnant that physical fitness side of my life went out the window. I exchanged running shorts for sweatpants and ate pretty much anything that sounded appealing. Pregnancy was not easy for me. I struggled with aches and pains throughout the nine months and never could muster the will or energy to be very active. Between my new eating habits and lack of physical activity I gained 50+ pounds by the end of my pregnancy.
My son is now 20 months old and I am still working towards my pre-pregnancy weight. I have the classic mum-tum and am lacking muscle and toning all over my body. I don’t want to come across like I don’t love my body. I truly do. This body brought my son into the world and I love it for that reason. I would go through the pregnancy and all of its trials and ordeals a hundred times to have my son, but I want to look into the mirror and feel confident in my own skin and I can’t say that I feel that way right now. Right now I feel like I am wearing a costume and it’s not me.
I don’t make new years resolutions because I am never good at keeping them, but there are some things that I would like to work on in 2018. One of those things is to develop the habit of waking up earlier each morning and fitting in some time to myself.
I am the type of person that enjoys having time to myself. These days between my role as a wife, mother of a busy 20 month old, and a part time job, I find that I rarely have any time to myself. Waking up early before the sun and the rest of my household is awake would allow me to have some much needed alone time. I would like to use that time to fit in a daily workout, spend time with the Lord in devotions, or curl up with a good book that I am often too tired to read at night.
In order to try to cultivate this habit I have decided to challenge myself to wake up early everyday for 30 days. My goal would be to wake at 5:00 every morning, but lets just say somewhere between 5:30 and 6 am to be realistic.
I already know that this is going to be hard. Most mornings when my alarm clock goes off I am guilty of hitting that wonderful snooze button and snuggling back under the warm covers, but something has to change. I need some time to myself to pursue the things that make me feel like a woman who has an identity outside of being a mom.
Please don’t misunderstand me. I love being a mother more than anything, but there is so much more to me than just that role. This past year has been a struggle for me because I feel like I spend all of my waking time as “mommy” and I need to have some time to just be “Nicole”. I hope that by doing this challenge I can learn to carve out a little time in my day just me. Some time to refresh, to renew my spirit, and to pursue new ventures.
If you have any tips that make waking up early in the morning easier please comment below. I would love to hear them.
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